TOGGS-DOGS (fighting the flab)

Friends, collies and Millie – my comrade in paws,

We don’t seem to be gathering much support for DADI (Dogs Against Diets Incorporated). Our poor fellow victims must be too weak, from their diets, to even think about marching for their rights. Therefore, I think we need to up the anti and go radical. Millie, are you up for it?

To start off with, here’s something to wear when we are forced to go to those two legged things in white coats, who are licenced to put us through horrible examinations and invade our bits and bobs.

dog on diet 2

DAVID! is a new slogan. It stands for, Dogs Against Veterinary Imposed Diets. You just have to print this off, onto an adhesive label, and find a badge to stick it onto. I’m told your people have done their bit of lobbying and marching in their time, so there should be the odd badge knocking about the place. Don’t get them mixed up though. I think your vet would accuse you of casting aspersions on his veterinary ethics, about segregated dogs, if you went in wearing an anti-apartheid badge. Becky – my person’s niece – is big into supporting the underdog, so I’ll I see if I can get her to find us a ready supply of cheap badges. I’m sure that when we have a few barks, with fellow travellers in the waiting room, they’ll be champing at the bit to join our campaign.

I was in one of the torture chambers again today and had a nasty receptacle inserted into my left nostril. I think Andy was a bit sympathetic to my cause (despite his professional status) because he did manage to relent a bit, compensating for the intrusion with a small portion of Danish blue.

Just one question for you Millie, how are your leadership skills? I’m big on vision and direction myself but I’m a bit lacking in the tact and diplomacy department. Don’t forget to check out the comments part of my posts on the website, where I type my replies to you.

I’m also big into power napping. Does that come under leadership?

And so to bed.

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Love Ben xx

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4 thoughts on “TOGGS-DOGS (fighting the flab)

  1. OK Ben,
    Lesson No 1. in the tact and diplomacy game – make the eyes as big, round and meltingly adorable as possible then gaze with soulful expression at the mug, sorry, kind person you wish to con, sorry, charm.
    Lesson No2 lean against them as if they were the most wonderful person in the world.
    You will be pleasantly surprised how they rapidly become putty in the paw.
    I have to tell you that there is most terrible unfairness in this house. Mimi and I only get two small meals a day, but Annie is allowed as much as she can eat, on vet’s orders! Now where is the justice in THAT?
    Don’t tell anyone I have said this but I have found that as I begin to lose weight I can run across fields much faster and not be puffed when I decide it might be time to return to my people. I don’t want them to go home without me in case I miss a meal, now do I?
    Yours in solidarity, despite what I just about improved speed and stamina,
    Millie

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  2. Gosh Millie,

    Sound advice as ever, Looks like I’m going to need to do a lot of skills practice, with the gooey big eyes. I’ve done a bit of the leaning thing in the past but I really don’t like to give away my dependency. Still, needs must.

    Woof, oh woof, you know vets that recommend an in increase food intake! I’ve never, ever, heard of that before now. Let’s keep all our paws crossed that it happens to us one day.

    I know what you mean about the speed and stamina thing. I’m beginning to feel the same. Like you say, lets stay mum!

    On that note, my people say that your people might be thinking about one of the best mum’s ever, as I type this reply. I wished we’d known her because she was big into loving dogs, and I suspect she would never have put us on a diet.

    Love Ben x

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